Social Media has brought so much to my attention. If only it had been so easy to realize I wasn't the only one suffering with body confidence years ago.
When you know you are not alone with something you are struggling with it can certainly help. It's when we feel all alone on an island that we are even more vulnerable. I believe so many of us suffer silently in so many ways that we do feel so alone and isolated, when in fact there is always someone else dealing with the same stuff... it's just a matter of finding them. Again, support is key!
When I really think back to when it might have started it was so long ago I can't actually pin-point the moment. I think I became aware I was not "skinny" in grade school. Girls can be so mean! Now, mind you I wasn't overweight or anything like that, I just wasn't skin on bones. As I got older it was really apparent that weight was an issue at home... you lost weight, you gained weight, and so on. But the real issue came in a relationship with this boy back in my twenties.
That's what prompted me to write this. I came across a "transformation" photo the other day on Instagram of a girl who had been in a relationship where she was never skinny enough... what that does to your mind is so deflating.
Mine started with the hair on my arms. He did not like the hair on my arms, so I used a product to get it off. There were comments about by weight, comments that he did not love me, and so much more. It's amazing what we put up with as women. He never hit me. So I know it could have been worse, but the emotional damage was real. It took years to get over that!
We as women have to be stronger than that! We cannot let others define our worth because of their own insecurities! We can hide so much behind a smile....
I think it's amazing when people can have confidence in their bodies, where they are, at this very moment! That's what we all need to strive for... that's what is so very important!
When I looked in the mirror in 2014 I did not like the way I looked - I am pretty sure my confidence was still shook from all the years before, but something happened. It was a combination of losing weight and gaining muscle that I gained my confidence. It was not just a number on a scale. It was the way I felt overall.
In September 2018 I started to gain weight. My pup, Glasgow had been diagnosed with cancer it was
about taking care of him. That was sort of my breaking point. After he passed in November, I continued to gain weight. Right now my clothes are tighter and the number on the scale is higher, but my body confidence is OK. Because I have done so much for my body confidence, because I have found a group of people who suffer from the same things, and have overcome them, it has helped me! Support is key!
This is not just something I say because I believe you should join my accountability and support group. This is a proven fact.
"Humans, because of necessity, evolved into social beings. Dependence on and cooperation with each other enhanced our ability to survive under harsh environmental circumstances. Although the survival threats of these circumstances have lessened in today’s world (have they really?), people continue to have a need to affiliate with others. Indeed, the lack of such connections can lead to many problems, including loneliness." From Psychology Today.
In my support groups we work on body confidence. Yes, it's awesome if you already have it, but so many women do not! I invite you to join me!
But for right now, this very second I want you to tell yourself one thing that you love about yourself! Just one thing!
Thanks for reading.